So my roommate/cousin and I were just discussing the worst possible scenarios for the Bears following Sunday's game. Here they are:
The Bears fire Marc Trestman. They then trade Jay Cutler to Tennessee for Zach Mettenberger. Mettenberger and Jimmy Clausen have a competition for starting quarterback next season.
The Bears fire Marc Trestman. They then hire Rex Ryan. They trade Jay Cutler to Tennessee for a 4th round pick. Then sign Marc Sanchez to a 4-year/$28 million dollar deal. The Bears now have Rex Ryan and Marc Sanchez.
The Bears fire Marc Trestman. They then hire Rex Ryan. They trade Jay Cutler to Tennessee for a 4th round pick. Then sign Marc Sanchez to a 4-year/$28 million dollar deal. The Bears now have Rex Ryan and Marc Sanchez. They then trade that 4th round pick they received for Jay Cutler to the New York Jets for Geno Smith. Marc Sanchez and Geno Smith have a competition to be the Bears starting quarterback.
The Bears fire Marc Trestman. The Bears hire Shanahan as head coach. Kyle Shanahan. Coach Kyle Shanahan needs a veteran quarterback to help teach his offense to the starter. The Bears sign Rex Grossman.
The Bears fire Marc Trestman. They hire Rex Ryan as head coach. They sign Rex Grossman at quarterback. Rex is both our coach and quarterback.
The Bears fire Phil Emery. They retain Marc Trestman, convinced by Jimmy Clausen's performance, but only under the condition he fire his coaching staff. The Bears then trade Jay Cutler to Buffalo for Kyle Orton and Defensive Coordinator Jim Schwartz.
The Bears fire Marc Trestman and trade Jay Cutler to Buffalo for new Bears Head Coach Jim Schwartz.
Everyone stays.
The Bears fire Marc Trestman. They hire Mike Shanahan as head coach. The Bears trade Jay Cutler and trade for Robert Griffin III (either for each other or in separate moves). RGIII on the Soldier Field turf... ... ...plays surprisingly well and leaves after one year to pursue other opportunities. Where did you think I was going with that, you sickos?
The Bears trade Jay Cutler and the 7th overall pick to Cleveland for the 16th overall pick and Johnny "F'n" Football. The turnovers double.
The Bears fire Marc Trestman. The Falcons fire Mike Smith. The Bears hire Mike Smith as head coach. Mike Smith names Mike Tice Offensive Coordinator.
The Bears are discovered to have a "Bounty-gate" type scandal in their locker room, triggering an ancient rule that disallows any of the coaching staff involved to be fired. Marc Trestman and Mel Tucker are named culprits. Aaron Kromer is named Interim Head Coach.
The Bears fire Marc Trestman. They trade Jay Cutler for woefully less than market value. They sign Brian Hoyer at quarterback. The Bears go through another 20 starting quarterbacks before they find a franchise QB, meanwhile Jay Cutler wins three Super Bowl rings for the Tennessee Titans.
The Bears fire Marc Trestman. They hire Mike Singletary as head coach. They can't win with him. Can't do it.
The Bears fire Marc Trestman. They name Norv Turner as head coach. Norv Turner hires Ron Turner as Offensive Coordinator.
The Bears clean house. Someone walks in with muddy shoes (bah-dum!).
The Bears fire Marc Trestman. They hire Darrell Bevell like they should have two years ago.
The Bears fire Marc Trestman. They hire John Hufnagel, current head coach of the Calgary Stampeders, as his replacement.
The Bears clean house. They hire Mike Ditka as both General Manager and Head Coach. Ditka trades the Bears entire draft for Melvin Gordon III.
The Bears fire Marc Trestman. They hire former Defensive Assistant and former Defensive Backs coach Greg Schiano as head coach. Things get worse.
Submitted December 27, 2014 at 12:26AM by rblumenfeld76 http://www.reddit.com/r/CHIBears/comments/2qicbp/doomsday_scenarios/
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